HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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