I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
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I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
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He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
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