Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
