Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
Randomize
