How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
