Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
