It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
