I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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