I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
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