she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
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