Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize