Screwed.edu
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
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