connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize