I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
Randomize
