i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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