But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
