I am puke
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
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She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
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My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
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