You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
