I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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