I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
Randomize
