I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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