that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
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