plz talk dirty to me
Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
