i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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