reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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