no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
