Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
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