Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
how do you play pong handcuffed?
The feeling are messing with the penis
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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