yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
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