I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
