It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
You should frame my arrest warrant.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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