Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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