even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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