I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
