It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
how drunk are you?
Several
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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