sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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