I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Randomize
