Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
