Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
