We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
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I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
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Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
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