I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Girls should come with a carfax report
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Randomize
