At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
