I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize