There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
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