I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
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