Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
