Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I will be naked everywhere
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
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