I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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