I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
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