I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
